Youth Sports Parents, Come To Your Senses
Youth Sports Parents, Come To Your Senses. I see you over there, with your fancy Ipad recording device, standing the entire game, nervously pacing. With each hit, dig, or block, your entire body sways with the action. Your excitement is palpable, but so is your disappointment.
You are completely and utterly caught up in the throes of a U14 girl’s volleyball game. It has taken you over.
There is no judgment here. There is only compassion, as I have been there as well. I am a recovering youth sports junkie.
I know all about those highs and lows. The excited and giddy feeling in the pit of your stomach leading up to the game, the intense excitement during the game, followed by the ‘crash’ afterward, sometimes good, after a W, or sometimes bad, feeling agitated and cranky after an L.
But don’t worry, I know you have the best intentions. You want what’s best for your kid. After all, only you know how hard she’s been working, how nervous she gets before each match, and how she prays every night she will grow taller.
But in order to do what’s best for her, you need to take a step back and come to your senses. And I don’t mean that the way it sounds. I mean it literally.
“Come to your senses,” the mindfulness technique.
This simple exercise can have a profound effect on your youth sports parenting.
The “Come To Your Senses” technique is just what it says, come into your senses. Become aware of your five senses: sight, sound, touch, taste, and smell. Follow the simple steps I’ve laid out below, and you will inevitably be transported to the present moment, no longer caught up in your own thoughts or the outcome of what’s happening on the court or field. It slows down the event and allows you to truly be present, to step back and allow it to be their experience and not yours.
It’s very simple and easy to do. Here is a step-by-step guide to help you. This exercise should be done without judgment; simply observe and accept whatever comes up.
- Recognize. You are starting to get pulled into the emotions of the game. You know this because you feel your heart beat faster and adrenaline rush. Maybe your stomach is in knots. Learn to recognize the signs when it’s starting. Maybe it’s every game, maybe it’s only the close games or the games with consequences. But begin to know when it will happen so you can prepare yourself.
- Breath. Take 3 deep breaths in through your nose, fill up your chest, then slowly release through your mouth.
- Touch. Think about what is touching you. What does it feel like? Are you sitting on a cold bleacher seat? Are you sitting on the grass, or if you’re standing, what does the ground feel like under your feet? Is it hard? Are your shoes comfortable? Are you holding a device? Is it cold in your hand?
- Sound. What are you hearing? Focus on the sounds. Loud whistles, music, athletes talking to each other, a coach yelling?
- Sight. What are you seeing? Who is near you? What does the room look like? What color are the opposing team’s jerseys?
- Smell/Taste. Are you chewing gum or drinking water? What does it taste like? Is there any smell in the area? Is someone eating nearby? Can you smell it?
Typically it takes only two or three to get back to the present moment. By doing this, you immediately get out of your head and off the emotional roller coaster ride of the game. It allows you to step back from your child’s experience and instead get into your own presence of mind, to not be overcome by your thoughts and emotions and to make better decisions for yourself. It is impossible to be both in the present moment and to be overcome by an external event.
The Come To Your Senses Technique has many benefits outside of youth sports, improved concentration and focus, better emotional regulation, and a greater ability to manage stress. It is also an excellent way to practice self-care, as it can help reduce anxiety and improve overall mood.
But by far, the best reason for youth sports parents to practice ‘Come To Your Senses’ is for your child. By stepping into the present moment, you are stepping out of their game and out of the role of a pressuring parent. They can stop having to deal with your frustration or exuberance on the sidelines. Instead, you will be giving their game back to them, which is where it belongs.
More articles from Ilovetowatchyouplay.com that you might like:
My Daughter Quit Sports, And This Is What Youth Sports Parents Need To Know
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