The Drive There: The Moment That Changes Everything
The Drive There: The Moment That Changes Everything. I’ve spent years talking about the car ride home—how we as parents mess it up, how we turn a moment that should be about connection into one filled with tension, frustration, and unintentional pressure. But lately, I’ve been thinking:
We’ve been looking in the wrong direction.
The real opportunity to shape our kids’ sports experience isn’t after the game, when the results are already in. It’s before it even begins. It’s The Drive There.
Where It All Starts
I’ve had countless car rides with my kids on the way to their games. Some filled with silence. Some where I rattled off advice that I was sure was helpful—only to be met with blank stares out the window. Some where I could feel their nerves but didn’t know what to say. And, if I’m being honest, some where my own stress seeped into the car, making it feel heavier than it should have been.
I look back now and realize those drives weren’t just transportation—they were an opportunity. A chance to set the tone, to ground myself, and most importantly, to give my child exactly what they needed in that moment: calm, confidence, and space to own their experience.
How We’re Getting It Wrong
We are a generation of parents who love hard and care deeply. But sometimes, our love gets tangled up in pressure, in expectation, in our own fears about whether we’re doing enough, or if they are.
We overtalk. We overanalyze. We make game day bigger than it should be.
And the car ride there? That’s where it all begins. That’s where the pressure can build—or where we can defuse it. It’s where our kids take their first breath of pre-game nerves—or where we can help them settle in and feel ready.
What if, instead of filling the car with last-minute advice, we filled it with peace?
What if, instead of amping them up with all the things they need to do, we reminded them why they love this?
What if, instead of making it about us, we let it be about them?
Shifting the Ride There
I’ve been working on something. A book. A guide. A tool for parents like me, like you—who want to do better. Who want to get off the emotional rollercoaster and find a way to support our kids without adding to the pressure.
It’s about how to use The Drive There—not just as a moment of physical transportation, but as a way to prepare both ourselves and our kids for what’s ahead.
How to:
✅ Manage our own stress before we pass it on to them.
✅ Use simple tools like breathwork, music, and visualization to help them feel confident.
✅ Know when to talk, when to listen, and when to just be quiet.
✅ Create pre-game rituals that build resilience and joy.
Because this time matters. More than we realize.
